Personal power comes from a healthy self-esteem. Do the things that strengthen you. Learn new ways of becoming better at whatever it is you do. Read a good book, listen to an uplifting audio and for Pete’s sake – Stop trying to beat the clock! People with a ‘time’ issue will never have enough time to do what they like. The suicidal war cry: “It’s gotta be done yesterday” belongs to another world, and other species who are slowly drowning in a pool of regret.
At one stage or other we have all had an unsuspected bout of the jitters, that is, getting nervous about facing the music. Rest assured that it is normal and it is OK to feel nervous because this is part of being human and it means you are alive and well. But what can you do when you suddenly feel powerless?
Most people become nervous just before they enter the boss’s office for a performance review, when speaking with an irate person, taking part in a test or attending a job interview. Believe it or not, you are an emotional being. Whatever the situation, you can be certain that if you are human, alive and breathing (and if you are not, please stop reading and go make alternative arrangements), then you will definitely feel nervous. Nerves may manifest themselves as that knotted-up feeling in your tummy which feels like a squadron of moths flying in attack formation. You can’t get rid of it, but there is a way of diverting that nervous energy and harnessing its power to your benefit. How can we regain our personal power?
When Tiger woods hit a snag in his career his father was overheard telling his son, “…just go out and be yourself…” Earl Woods knew that it was all in the mind. How Tiger progressed since then has earned a place in sports history.
I was once performing as a Master of Ceremonies at a large charity function held on behalf of a hospital with over twelve hundred people attending. The audience was made up of doctors from all levels, medical staff and prominent people, VIPs and politicians etc. Behind the curtain was a well known comedian ready to come out and do his stuff. He was so famous that he had his own spot on TV. I went backstage to see if he was ready and what I found was a man who seemed to be scared of his own shadow. He was a mess, literally. Now, here was someone who had been on television and was a household name, but was gripped by a case of stage fright. I learnt there and then it can happen to the best of us. I genuinely felt for him and asked him a couple of gentle questions (I could see he was terribly agitated).
I then gave him some encouragement by speaking in soft tones and telling him how much I liked his humour and that most people thought he was the funniest man around. I kept a smile on my face and reassured him of his talents. He not only recovered but made jokes about me to the audience and I knew that he appreciated my motivation. It was understood between us. Once he got his confidence back and remembered who he was and his capabilities (talents), he was able to express himself again. The techniques I employed to help this man he could have used himself by simply looking into the mirror and using auto-suggestion to get his thoughts right again. It works much better if you say it aloud and let your own ears hear it.
Work harder on yourself and the rest will fall into place. What the world gives us is a perfect reflection of how we see ourselves. If you believe in yourself, walk tall and straight, then good things will come your way. Remove all thoughts of fear from your lifestyle because whatever you fear will become a reality. That is why it is essential for you to think positively at all times. Don’t listen to people who complain all the time and spend their life being armchair critics. Stop listening to the news first thing when you wake up and last thing before going to bed. Knowing all the bad stuff that is happening will not improve your personal power. It takes away from you. Here is a tip: if you want to change the world around you – then change the way you think.
The clue here is to relax and take it slowly. Watch and observe without emotion. Sit on a rock and think for a while. Breathe deeply and enjoy the surroundings. Take in the smells of freshness around and about you. Utilize all your senses. Be grateful for what you have, not sour about what you don’t have. Life is as you are painting it, second by second. Understand that you are a unique and special human being and no-one else alive has your thought patterns, experiences, desires, capabilities or aspirations. You call the shots, so learn to express – not impress! This is personal power.
Sal is dedicated to helping people become more aware of what they can achieve by acquiring better leadership skills, developing more confidence, becoming more assertive and creating a better work ethic. He has just returned from living in Northern Italy for over three years where he and his wife taught English as a second language and presentation skills to Italian and Swiss Professionals. His website http://www.speaknpresent.com serves as a resource for anyone who wishes to improve their dialectic skills and desire to enrich the way they express themselves. You may wish to check out the DIY Self Improvement section.
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