Jealousy is one of those strong emotions of a relationship that has the tendency to turn brutal very quickly. It might start out innocent enough – a snide comment here, an off-handed joke there – but in the end, there is always a hidden agenda being restrained that will eventually come out. And when it does, it is never a pretty sight.

Does the existence of jealousy automatically doom a relationship? Absolutely not. But ignoring it won’t make it any better, either. It has to be treated in a specific manner or the entire incident will blow up and no one will be better off.

There is no beating around the bush here. You have to confront the individual and ask them the reason for their jealousy. Chances are they were hurt in a past relationship and now their guard is up. If so, this is understandable. But it doesn’t give them the right to take it out on you.

You need to discuss things with them calmly, without criticizing, giving ultimatums, threats or anger. Remember, you are trying to get them to open up to you. If you launch an all-out assault against their character and their beliefs, it might appear to them their suspicions are valid.

At the same time, you have to stand your ground and make it clear to them their unfounded negative feelings will only succeed in driving you away. People will put up with some behaviors in a relationship, but being falsely accused of something so terrible and out-of-character for them is not one of them. This is a severe accusation and not something to be taken lightly.

A large part of this arrangement is going to have to be based on trust. They will have to trust you – that you won’t cheat and you have to trust they will make a conscious effort not to be accusatory. They need to tell you this is a reasonable request and they really do have the desire to put forth the effort that will be needed.

After you have this discussion with them, there will be a time they will either back down from their tendencies or they will continue without change. At this point, it might be better off to call it quits and move on. If the individual is not willing to budge on their accusations then this is probably something that will never be resolved. In fact, it might have been the reason for their last breakup.

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The stress of everyday life can take its toll on any intimate relationship. We are all hurried and over-scheduled most of the time these days. Between running back and forth to our jobs, and running our children to and from soccer practice, ballet, or karate, etc., it can become very frustrating when you are wanting to keep your intimate relationship solid. Aside from the hurried schedule of life, there are many other life stresses that can take a toll on your relationship with your life partner.

Simple issues like money problems, dealing with complications from previous relationships, and raising children, can wreak havoc in an intimate relationship. It’s very easy to turn away from each other when dealing with these type of issues. Some people simply go inward and refuse to talk about anything while others may turn to someone else. This is how many cases of infidelity start. The partners are unable or unwilling to talk to each other about the major issues at hand, so they turn to someone else who seems to have a more understanding ear.

It’s very important to remember you must turn to each other when there are problems helping to bring trauma to your relationship. These life stresses may be completely outside of the relationship and outside of your control, but that doesn’t mean they don’t add undue stress to your relationship. Sometimes it can be simple things within the household that are causing a rift. For instance, if there is one party who doesn’t help around the house. Even though this seems like such a simple issue, it can add up over time helping one of the partners to feel very resentful.

Partners should sit down from time to time to air out any issues that are starting to fester. You don’t want these issues to chip away at your relationship. Take time to communicate openly with your partner about what’s really bothering you. Even if the issues are outside of your relationship, let them know how much stress it is putting you under. Maybe there is something they can do to help you, to support you. For instance, if you feel like you’re being rushed every day because you’re carrying the kids back and forth to their activities, maybe your partner could take some of that load off of your daily schedule.

Remember your relationship is supposed to be the happy part of your life, the best part of your life. Your partner is called your partner for a reason. This is the person you have chosen to spend your life with, so let them help you when stresses are getting you down.

Are you having problems dealing with stress? How is this affecting your intimate relationship? Have a look and see what destructive emotions are at the heart of the problems you are experiencing? Think about what you are really telling yourself and look at your beliefs.